I absolutely believe in families as the building blocks of society. I also believe that our happiness in our family is probably one of the most important factors in determining our overall happiness and even our mental health. It comes as no surprise then that I support useful tools like family counseling services. These can help prioritize, protect, and repair family relationships. If you are wondering how family therapy works or what are the family therapy benefits, this article is for you. It is designed to help answer questions about family therapy types. I also provide a few example family therapy activities so that you can decide if it is right for you and your family situation.
Some people find the idea of therapy embarrassing. To those people, I say, there is nothing wrong with getting help when you need it. I have used family therapy at a few different times when I didn’t know how to fix things myself. It was such a relief to have a counselor guide us through those difficult times. Life sure can throw some curveballs! I am so thankful for our positive family counseling experiences. Therefore, I definitely encourage others to seek the help of professional counselors when they need guidance. It really helps you to organize your thoughts and feelings and communicate them effectively to solve issues.
What is Family Counselling?
Family counseling as a branch of psychological therapy has been around for almost a century. With the increasing acceptance of psychological therapy, it has become a very common tool to improve the lives of many families. It is an umbrella term for family group therapy. Its aim is to fix issues between couples and families as a whole.
Don’t be confused as it’s also called family counselling (British), family therapy, marriage counselling, couple’s therapy etc. As long as it’s given by a certified member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), it’s the same thing. Also, family therapy doesn’t discriminate and has a broad definition of what a family is. It can be for traditional families as well as those with same sex parents, a childless couple, extended family, and so on.
What is Family Therapy?
It’s important to understand the ambiguity and subtleties between therapy and counseling. They are interlinked and can’t really be completely distinct from one another. Therapy is a longer process that leans more to psychology. Whereas, counseling is not as in-depth as therapy and aims to deal with help with specific problems. For instance, dealing with grief, addiction, stress and such calls for counseling. Therapy may involve strengthening of the family unit to solve a specific problem, as is the case with strategic therapy. Dealing with depression, behaviors, and a wider range of chronic issues you might need a longer therapy. This may also incorporate more cognitive exercises.
What Can Family Counseling Help With?
Here are some of the issues that family therapy services are meant to help with: conflicts between family members, infidelity, death or illness in the family. It also tackles matters like separation, divorce, LGBTQ issues, addiction in the family, and caring for family members with special needs or mental illness. Family counseling can help address things like family conflicts, family betrayal, anger management issues or even sexual orientation issues. One of the most common reasons to visit a family therapist is emotional and behavioral difficulties in children. Keep on reading if you feel that your entire family may benefit from counseling.
Family Therapy Types
As you investigate Family Counseling Services, keep in mind there are four main types of family therapy practiced today.
Bowenian Therapy
Bowenian Therapy is the main approach if individuals cannot or don’t want to involve another family member in the treatment, but not exclusive to that. It’s considered more cognitive and less practical. It is based on triangulation – the necessity to vent to a third party when in conflict or distress, and differentiation. It teaches the individual to differentiate himself from the family and see them as people detached from their role in the unit. Differentiation leads to less need to triangulate.
Structural Therapy
What is Structural Family Therapy? Well, the answer is in the name. Structural therapy aims to strengthen the family structure. It checks that the parents are in control, and that the children and parents don’t cross any appropriate boundaries. The therapist “joins” the family and observes their dynamics. Through this he enhances his ability to strengthen the family bonds.
Systemic Therapy
Systemic Therapy focuses on the unconscious communications and the meaning behind their individual behaviors. The therapist will remain neutral and will let the family dive deeper into their problems.
Strategic Therapy
What is strategic family therapy? Well, Strategic Therapy is perhaps the most popular type of therapy. This is largely because it is short and practical. The therapist assigns homework to the family members. This is supposed to change the way the family communicates and interacts with each other. It will also effect they way they make decisions. The therapist takes the power and authority in this type of treatment, thus allowing weaker family members to come forwards and communicate more effectively. This approach is also the more suited to online therapy compared to the other types.
Family Therapy Benefits
What are the benefits of family therapy and counseling?
Your family could highly benefit from therapy if you suffer from problems that family therapy can solve. Many families who underwent therapy report a better mutual understanding. This is especially true of boundaries which are important for a healthy family. Communication is also highly improved which leads to better problem solving as a unit. Better empathy and reduced conflict is also reported.
Family therapy can be essential to help bringing the family together after death or crisis. It is useful for reenlisting trust between family members and helping family members forgive each other. It is beneficial for developing a supportive and positive environment. Family therapy can also be effective for bringing back isolated family members.
How Family Therapy Works
Family therapy is a multidisciplinary field. It employs exercises and techniques from behavioral, cognitive, and interpersonal therapy schools and more. Usually, this kind of therapy is between 5-20 sessions and aims to solve things quickly. Or at least lay the foundation for a healthy and functional family relationship. However, the more behavioral and chronic the problems are, you can expect a longer treatment.
Family Therapy Activities
How are you really? Family therapy activities help you address and answer this question together. Family therapists know the most effective way of dealing with challenging situations is make sure you are all active participants in your healing.
What kind of activities can you expect in a family therapy?
When you have young children or adolescents in your family, the usual therapy activities involve art and play. This can encourage parents and children to enhance communication between them. It also moves the discussion from the intellectual and abstract to the world of imagination and spontaneity. Furthermore, family therapy exercises help bypass the barriers currently apparent in both the parents and children.
Examples Of Family Counseling Services Activities For Young People:
Emotional Ball
This game intends to let family members share their emotions and is popular with kids and teenagers. Participants throw a beach ball with words that describe feelings on it (sad, happy, lonely, stressed, etc). Once an individual catches it, he’s asked to describe the last time he felt like the word facing him. This game is an example of breaking barriers of talking about feelings, for children and adults alike.
Mirroring Activity
This family therapy activity is especially good for children. Two family members face each other, and the one who’s taking the lead moves slowly while the other tries to copy him. It makes family members work with each other, and attune to one another.
The Miracle Question
The counsellor asks each family member the miracle question. If a miracle was to happen tonight, what will be the first thing you would notice when you wake up that signals you are now in a better world? This exercise is great for adults, but works for kids too. It allows each family member to show his desires and wishes.
The Colored Candy Game
Each family member gets 7 pieces of small and colorful candy, and is asked to sort them by colors. Then each member will need to give words for each candy. For example, green – how your family has fun, yellow – words that describe your family, blue – things you’d like to improve about your family, and so on. A discussion will arise more often than not. At the end each member will need to tell what he learned, what took him by surprise, and how he will work to make changes. This is usually an ice breaker at the beginning of a therapy.
These play oriented techniques are used in child focused counselling and even with adults. These family therapy activities allow children and adults to share their emotions with less shame, guilt, or discomfort. Therapy games change the usual roles and dynamics of the family in a controlled environment. These games can serve to focus the discussion on certain issues that need to be addressed. Finally, it also allows the therapist to witness and follow your family dynamics. This is crucial for his or her success in helping you.
How to find a family therapist suitable for your needs?
You can ask your doctor to recommend a family counselor or therapist and this is the approach many people take. However, a more efficient approach is to search in the AAMFT directories for a suitable therapist for you. In many cases, especially if the counseling you’re seeking is not child focused, you can look for an online therapist in a reputable online therapy platform. These are more popular than ever (due to Covid-19 lockdowns). Another good idea before your initial appointment is to contact your insurance. They can help you determine if they cover family therapy and provide a list of who they work with.
If you don’t have insurance and you are not sure you can afford therapy, don’t let finances be a barrier. Affordable counseling is within your reach, it just make take a little more research. There are many counsellors who will work on a sliding scale so be sure to ask. Additionally, there are many religious organizations that will offer free services. If you can’t get your loved ones to go with you, individual therapy may be a good starting point.
Professional counseling therapy sessions can help make positive changes for the whole family unity through cognitive behavioral therapy. Healing relationship problems can help make a huge difference in your everyday life.
Would my family benefit from family counseling services?
If you read all the way here, the answer is most likely yes. Did you identify with some of the issues families face in this post? Do you feel that your children have behavioral or emotional issues? Do you have trust issues with your partner? Seeking help isn’t a shameful thing. On the contrary, trying to save your relationship and family is brave! If you think there is a chance family counseling can improve your quality mental health, try it!
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john baylis says
problems related to family are increasing in the post modern era. The life is changing, becoming fast, and individualism is pushing its roots deep into the ground of family culture. In these difficult times, I found this article amazingly beautiful and would like to share with my friends who are going through difficult situations and family problems. The overall environment of your home also affects your family.
Eve Mitchell says
I loved what you said about family therapy being good for kids. My husband and I are going through a rough patch, but we don’t want to give up. I think family therapy would be perfect for us.